by Andrew Anglin via Daily Stormer

A Ukrainian people’s resistance movement in Kiev prepares for the Russian attack.

Photos emerging from the conflict zone in the Ukraine show Ukrainian civilian resistance fighters looking joyful as they prepare to defend their homeland, while Russians are seen looking depressed and downtrodden as they forgot to bring gas for their tanks.

Russia invaded the Ukraine last week because Vladimir Putin is a dictator who insists he will rebuild the Soviet Union.

Josef Konisky owned a pastry shop in Kiev before the invasion began, and he decided to take up arms against the brutal Russian invasion. He now leads a band of rebels who he says are “ready to fight to the last man” to defend democracy and freedom.

Josef Konisky, Ukrainian pastry shop owner turned militia leader

The Times spoke to Konisky, who said that “desperate times call for desperate measures, and I will do everything to protect my homeland and defend the freedom of our democracy.”

Konisky laughed when shown pictures of Russian fighters on their way to Kiev who had to stop the movement of their military convoy because they forgot to bring gas.

Russian soldiers seen looking irritated as they realize that their convoy cannot move forward because they forgot to bring gas for their trucks and tanks.

Konisky was not surprised that the Russians would make a mistake like this, referring to the enemy as “dumb animals.”

“Russians think they are good at war, but they know nothing about the strength and heart of the Ukrainian people. They forget to bring gas, but soon they will forget everything, when we blow their brains out of their skulls,” Konisky explained.

Russians soldiers seen piled on a truck, headed back to Russia to pick up the gas they forgot.

“I never want a war,” Konisky told the Times. “I am happy with my life, with my freedom. I make cherry pies, pretzel buns, and fish cakes. But Russians bring the war to us, and we will not bow down.”

“My men are ready for anything. We have already killed over 4,000 Russian soldiers attempting to enter the city,” he said.

One of Konisky’s men, Volo Krensky, who is only 11 years old, has already had 160 confirmed kills, and was able to shoot down two Russian helicopters with his AK-47.

Volo Krensky is only 11, but has killed over 150 Russian soldiers while defending Kiev.

“The key is to aim at the rotors,” Volo told the Times when explaining how he was able to shoot down helicopters. “When the rotors have holes in them, air gets through, and it causes the helicopter to crash.”

Koninsky also explained his anti-tank strategy.

“We fill balloons with paint, and throw them at the tanks, and it disables them,” he said. “Often, we send young children on these anti-tank missions, as they are smaller and harder to hit.”

Konisky said that he did not know that you could take out a tank with a balloon, but he read it from an American journalist on Twitter, and has found the technique extremely efficient. He says his team has taken out more than 200 tanks using balloons.

He says that his team spends hours each day scanning Twitter for tactical advice from American journalists.

Konisky’s squad is so effective that Vladimir Putin has personally addressed him, putting a bounty on his head. He passed out pamphlets to his soldiers reading “Get Konisky.”

The brutal Russian dictator, who been using cluster bombs in Kiev to kill children, gave a special address calling out Koninsky as the chief threat to his aggressive war effort.

Konisky’s deadly band has gotten so famous in the Ukraine and across the world that Joe Biden addressed him personally at his State of the Union address, ending his address with “Koninsky – go get him.”

Note: There might be traces of humor in this piece.